Thursday, October 11, 2012

starburst kind of love

combination of an old post and something ive been thinking about for a while...

it started with: tonite i sat snacking on an assortment of starbursts. Nothing unusual in that except i notice i'm eating them differently than i ever have in my life. i'm usually the presort kind of person who just pulls out the ones they like and then slowly picks off the other flavors. well tonight i am purposely setting aside the yellow as i come to them and mindlessly munching the other flavors reguardless of preference. after the third one in a row that was not pink (starburst pink is the only pink i like in the whole world for the record lol) i realize what i'm doing and i laugh hysterically. i was subconciously saving franks favorite starburst for him. This tells me several things about frank and about me.

Obviously he likes yellow starburst. I like him so much i saved him starburst(my second favorite candy in the whole world). He makes me smile even when he is not around. I think of him even when i'm not trying to think about him. We share- and i bring this up because all couples should share and not feel slighted in doing it. The little things about him are important to me. And then I sighed cause everyone should have a starburst kind of love- the kind of love that changes u in so many positive ways but doesn't in essence change the you-ness at all. I am so free with him so happy and so sure just like when the juicy fruitness hits ur tounge it's that good :)

And in honesty i feel this is what we're all after and not even in a romantic way but relationships that validate, inspire,((and original thought ended there)) and make us do goofy things just cause it makes someone else smile. And isn't it nice to every now and again just do things a little differently?? Isn't it grand to be put out of ourselves long enough to consider sweetness in any form even sacrifice??

Several years later, I'm okay to say its not frank who gets my starbursts anymore. Doing things a little differently meant holding onto the candy and not the cute guy I was saving it for. It meant letting go and moving on to bigger and better things. And I for one consider it an upgrade to know myself as I am today even with the stomach aches all that extra sugar brought me ;) And it may seem odd but I want to thank all my exes for the sickly sweet relationships that made me the hopeless romantic that I am. Thank you, LOVE, for the many moments we have shared over the years. And thank you GOD, for the many more amazing ones yet to be experienced.

Now a days, its a king sized pack split down the middle with sean sighing handing over the pinks for oranges :) Its still a starburst love but better than I imagined possible. I wish everyone the same juicy sweetness!